GRACE During the Postpartum Period

After becoming a mom I realized two things rather quickly. First of all, miracles really do happen. A tiny human was inside of ME, I gave birth, and then instantly said human was in my arms. Still hard to believe. And secondly, the 4th trimester (aka the postpartum period) is harder than the 1st (trimester). A simple "Hey, you may not be yourself for a bit" would’ve been appreciated. Or maybe someone could’ve told me that crying for no reason was perfectly normal. Or that feeling sad in the happiest of seasons was okay. As if going home in a makeshift mesh diaper (you know what I’m talking about mama) wasn’t enough, I was left feeling alone/scared/sad/anxious/happy and most importantly not enough.

Postpartum moms, whether it’s your first birth or  your fifth, I’m here to give you hope I and to talk about the most “untalked” about part of child birth. Because the only thing worse than the postpartum changes is not knowing what to do during this time. It’s only though God’s Grace that I myself was able to survive so I want to help you survive too, sister. To the tired, anxious mama here’s a little advice just for you - tips that I wish someone would’ve given me.

G - Give yourself time to get the weight off. Give yourself time to get your house cleaned. Give yourself time to be the mom you thought you would me. (It’s been 3 1/2 years for me, and I’m still not there.) And while you’re giving yourself time to be/do all these things, rock that sweet baby. The dishes, the weight, the parties - they can wait.

R - Remember you are the real MVP, mama.  Giving birth naturally is hard. Having a C-Section is hard. Asking for that epidural is hard. (But praise Jesus for medicine.) Unexpected complications are hard. Not being able to stuff your swollen feet into your boots after delivery is hard. {Okay so maybe that was just me.}  But YOU did it! You are a rockstar! You gave birth to that sweet, perfect baby. Only you.

A - Ask for help. Ask your mom to come rock that baby so you can sleep. Ask other moms for advice. (It’s almost always better than Google.) Ask your husband to help at home and take a night shift, it’s his baby too. Ask for the medicine from your doctor. Ask to speak to a therapist. Just ask. It’s okay to need postpartum support, sweet mama.

C - Cry it out mama. One day you’ll likely let the sweet baby you are holding do the same. For now, it’s your turn. Sometimes you won’t know if they are happy tears or sad tears and that’s okay. A good cry never hurt anyone. If you have older children, let them see you cry. What better way to show them that vulnerability is okay - that it’s okay to not be okay. Even mama isn’t perfect all the time.

E - Everyone is different. Every birth and every postpartum period are different. In a society where perfection is shoved in our faces, this may be the most important thing to remember. No two moms are the same. No one’s story is the same. No one’s circumstances are the same. God made you, YOU for a reason - embrace it! Don’t compare your journey to others. Not only is it unhealthy, but you are also only seeing a snapshot of that Pinterest mom’s life - not the whole story.

So, the next time you are crying in the shower for no apparent reason or are scared to let someone hold your baby or are left feeling less than enough, remember it’s okay. Whether you gave birth a week ago or 3 1/2 years ago - just breathe mama. And maybe, most importantly give yourself a little Grace.



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